In Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back there's a scene on a movie lot where they were filming Daredevil, the Movie. I figured this was a pretty good joke and laughed at it. Daredevil is one of the most boring, sanctimonious asses of a superhero that ever was. No way would anyone ever make a Daredevil movie. Imagine my suprise when I found out that there actually is a big budget movie coming out next year.

I read way too many Marvel comics for like 10 or 12 years. In that time I think every single time I ever read anything with Daredevil in it he acted like he had his cane shoved up his ass. I can't even count the number of times he got all preachy and holier than thou with every single frickin' person he ever teamed up with. In terms of irritation factor he is almost as obnoxious as Superman villians like Bizarro or Mr. Mitzelwhateverthehellsaynamebackwardsis.

I sure wish that the Punisher had just shot him long ago for collusion with the Kingpin or something. Spiderman should have just beaten the hell out of him on a daily basis and shot a big batch of webbing inside of Daredevil's pants. I can't believe how stupid most of the Daredevil/Spiderman crossovers were. Spiderman should have easily kicked his ass every time they fought. How strong is Daredevil compared to Spiderman? How much faster is Spidey? Who has a spider sense that warns them of danger? Who has prenatural balance and the ability to stick to walls? Who has fought the Hulk multiple times and not gotten their ass kicked? Note: The answer to all of these questions is that Spiderman outclasses Daredevil in every category. Heck, I still don't know how Daredevil ever managed to not get killed by Bullseye.

Something even worse than Daredevil is his alter ego. He's a lawyer. Ooo, let's take a really crappy hero who everyone hates and give him the world's least liked profession. If I sucked as bad as Daredevil I'd at least want the fallback of having a real job in my non-superhero life. Honestly, I think Daredevil may actually give Aquaman a run for the money as suckiest comicbook hero. Daredevil should join the Fantastic Four so that all of the really crappy early Marvel heroes are crammed together in the same place.

I'd much rather see a movie about Foolkiller or some other obscure Marvel character than Daredevil. Daredevil is about as exciting as butter on toast for dinner. Make that butter on toast preceeded by a twenty minute lecture on some absolutely pointless topic. I can think of a good Daredevil movie. It would consist of Stiltman, the original Kraven the Hunter, the Lizard, and various other villians kicking the crap out of Daredevil for eighty minutes. Then the last ten minutes would be Spiderman, Iron Man, or the Punisher showing up and rescuing his sorry ass while kicking some villian butt. No wait, it would be Speedball showing up to save him. Speedball, now there's a guy who would be entertaining in a movie.